O has always been rather mechanically inclined and focused. At a year, that meant an obsession with keys and locks. At 2, he became infatuated with gears, and the pipes in our house, and motors. When he turned three, his favorite book—he even slept with it sometimes—was the Reader’s Digest Guide to Home Improvement., especially the whole house layout of how all the pipes fit together. He will gladly spend an hour or so inspecting the inside of the toilet tank, (something I’ve had to make very clear is a supervised activity only), and will do anything for a peek under our hood.
A month ago, I took both boys to the grocery store, and it was O’s turn to take the little kid-sized cart around and N’s turn to ride in the big cart. I lost O for a second, and turn back one aisle to find him sitting in the middle of the aisle, inspecting the upside-down cart to see how it was put together. He couldn’t figure out how the wheels turned every which way and the cart still went straight. Just this afternoon, he woke before his brother, and looking at me conspiratorially, asked to go look at the pipes and ducts in the basement. We examined the water heater, the furnace, the laundry machines, and all the pipes and ducts. We looked at the “special box only for Grandpa” (the electric box). Hog heaven for this boy. Later, I pulled out a cooler and told him I was going to put ice in it to keep our food cold for our camping trip this weekend. He said, “But I thought the freezer keeps the ice cold. You are saying the ice keeps the cooler cold! That will not work, that’s what I think.” Lest you think this boy is destined to become an engineer of some sort, I should add that his interest in how things work extend to the natural world as well. He wants to know about the bugs and the plants and the birds too. And the bees. And plumbing. Do you get where this is going?
Right now, with amazing regularity, O thinks the time to lay a big question on me is between bedtime story number two and three. “How did I get in there, mama?” he asks – jabbing his chubby little hand at my stomach. The first time he asked, I just told him he grew from something so small you couldn’t even see it, and focused on how big he grew. The next evening, he repeated the question, this time with a hint of irritation. Ah, well, umm. I explained a bit more of the basic mechanics, trying to keep it simple.
Both boys are also in the common three-year-old phrase of asking absolutely constant “why” questions, and also asking the same question overandoverandover again. It is maddening sometimes, and exhausting. O’s questions seem to be pretty nuts-and-bolts, while N’s are often more about rules, or emotions, or things of a spiritual nature. Regardless, when they are together they talk over each other until my head spins, and then both get upset at not being heard. I can handle that—I know it’s healthy and normal to be full of questions at this age, and a lot of the time, I love to hear what they come up with. I can even do a pretty good deadpan off-the-cuff explanation of how babies are made if pressed. What I have a little more trouble with is O asking me about the finer points of human reproduction while in the checkout line at Target, wanting to know if human organs fit together like puzzle pieces.
But learn he will, if his persistent and inquisitive little mind seems to need to, at least the basics, and framed within our family’s value system. Hopefully, he will learn those things along with learning a little bit about what we do and do not discuss with cashiers at the store. I’m a little surprised that it came up this early, but we can roll with it. Incidentally, I was seven when I knew as much about the birds and the bees as my boys now do (how you ever pulled that off, I’ll never know, mom and dad). My brother was exactly 3 years, ten months, and ten minutes younger, because I explained my new knowledge to him in detail at the very first opportunity. I wasn’t going to keep that to myself. Apparently, O isn’t either, and if there would ever have been a reason I’d put off talking about sex with my kids, it would have been that, at least in retrospect.
Tonight, I finished story number two (another George and Martha story), and wondered if I was in for another big question. Would he ask if we all have to die, or why he can’t see God? Would he wonder why we don’t eat horses and dogs, but we do eat cows, chickens, and pigs? Nope. He jabbed his little hand at my stomach again, and said, “How did I get out of there, then?”